06/20/05
Ok,
so I left Salt Lake around 8:30 in the morning. The drive was pretty
uneventful until right after lunch. I'm back on the freeway when the
phone rings, which in itself is abnormal, since I usually turn it
off when I'm driving. I look at it and see that it's Alex calling,
and the first thing I think is "Is he already calling to see
why I'm not there yet?" So I click off the cruise control, slow
down to 80, answer the phone and he asks me where I'm at. I tell him
I just left Cedar City and am surprised that he is happy about that.
Well, it turns out that Scott and Jenn's car broke down just as they
were getting in to Mesquite, and they need me to pick up some parts
for them in St. George. Now, you'd think that finding the Subaru dealer
in St. George would be easy. Woulda been. If it hadn't really been
a Mitsubishi dealership with Subaru in white, in white brick, on one
side. Ah well, I found it and got the parts and got to Mesquite without
any further incident. We're staying in Mesquite, Nv and the triathlon
is in Hurricane, Ut, which despite being only about 40 miles out of
Mesquite, is an hour ahead time wise. This means that to get there
for the 8 am race, we have to leave our hotel at 6 am Mesquite time.
Yea! I get to sleep about midnight and have a 5 am wake up call. But
we get there on time, especially since the race started 10 minutes
late. They started with the swimming, Alex's comment after it was
"you don't realize how long a mile really is until you try it
in water." (or something like that). Lynda came out of the water
about 10 minutes before Alex and Marijke. Meanwhile, Scott, Jenn and
I were just hanging out, standing in the blazing sun trying to keep
from getting dehydrated. 10 minutes after Lynda took off on her bike,
Alex and Marijke left on theirs. They did really great on that leg
of the race, because they came in from the biking only a couple minutes
after Lynda, and all 3 of them were a lot further ahead in the race
overall than they were after the swimming leg. In other words, they
kicked ass on the biking part. After the 13 miles of biking, they
had to run 3 miles. Lynda came in first. Well, out of the 3 of them,
not in the race overall. Just a few minutes after Lynda, Alex and
Marijke came in literally together. It was cool to be there to see
the whole thing, watch as different people got in at different times
and hear the different cheering. And it was really nice to know that
Alex, Marijke and Lynda knew we were the ones there cheering them
on. And, I think, I got some really good pictures, which you can click
below to see. Anyways, after the race we headed to Chili's for some
lunch and then back to Mesquite. Where I had to deal with a flat tire
on the Mustang before I could head home. Jenn helped me get that stupid
little spare tire on the car, and then Scott drove down to the Big-O
Tires to get it fixed. Didn't cost me a dime (because I bought the
tires at Big-O), but the "20 minutes" it was supposed to
be turned out to be over an hour. Ah, well, at least it got fixed.
So, I made my rounds and said goodbye to everyone and headed back
to Salt Lake. Made it all the way to Beaver before I needed to pee,
and get gas, so I pull into the local, can you guess it?, Chevron,
where something happens that hasn't happened to me since the late
70's. Jeeze, what're you tninking? No, I didn't pee my pants. A guy
in a Chevron uniform comes out and asks me if I want to fill up and
what grade I want. Even washed the windows and checked the tires.
So's I ask him, I thought it was all self-serve. He tells me yup,
it is but when it gets slow they try to come out and give people full
service. Holy cow, thought I'd never see that again. Anyhoo, one of
my other tires had a nail in it, was already 15 lbs low even though
Big-O topped them all off. Two tires patched in one weekend, and this
time it really only took the 10 minutes he promised, although it wasn't
for free. Well, this is already too long, so time to wrap it up. Got
home safe and sound, slept well, got back to 'normal' life......... |
06/19/05
| Got the pictures
from the Triathlon up as soon as I could, so
Gotta run off to work, but I'll write about it when I get home. |
06/15/05
| Finally hooked up the power to the living room and porch lights. Getting the wires down to the switches in the living room was holding me up because I didn't want any conduit on the wall, so I had to feed the lines through the wall. I thought that getting them through the lathe and plaster, possible brick wall was going to be a royal pain. Well, started by just feeding the Romex up the wall and that didn't work, kept getting stuck on something or other. So I tried the wire fisher that I borrowed from Danny, and it went straight up to the hole at the header and pulled the Romex through slick as snot. Twice. Then I had to get the wire to the light on the porch, which meant sliding it up through the hole in the porch ceiling, crawling on my stomach along the lowest part of the roof line (over insulation and 100 years of dust) and reaching down into the roof of the porch. All the time listening to the peep. peep, peep. chirp, chirp, chirp of all the baby birds in the nests in my attic. Must be 3 or 4 nests up there. The upshot is that the house is fully lighted, and all that's left to hook up are a couple of plugs in the living room. |
06/14/05
"Chevron",
Act II, Scene XIV¼ |
Present
day. Late Afternoon at the big Chevron. Steve is sitting on the floor,
behind the counter, counting cigarettes, his back to the counter.
Amy is right behind him, or in front of him if you're the customer,
helping the customers. Drunk Guy comes in, goes to the cooler and
grabs a 6-pack of beer, some munchies and heads to the front counter. |
| AMY : Hi sir, did you find everything? |
| DRUNK GUY : Yes |
| (bink, bink, bink in the background as Amy rings up Drunk Guy's purchases) |
| AMY : Is there anything else I can get you? |
| DRUNK GUY : Yeah, my wife back. |
| Budda-bim, budda-boom. |
Yes,
this really happened. His story was sad, and he was obviously heartbroken,
but it was so out of context, and unexpected, that it struck us as
funny. He told Amy his story, the whole time with me with my back
to them. Amy responded appropriately as he told her about meeting
his wife in Vegas, her bad year with 4 jobs in 8 months, their plan
to move up to Salt Lake and how she didn't come up after he got settled
here. Anyways, after he left I got up, looked at Amy and said "Chevron,
gas, munchies, psychic readings (see story below) and therapy,
how may I help you?" |
06/13/05
I hate the human race. Guy got pissed off when I told him that since he has no license plate on his car that he has to pre-pay. Another guy got pissed off because apparently he couldn't remember his zip code. When I tried to explain that he had to punch it in at the pump, and that it was to help prevent stolen credit cards from being used, he got even madder and asks me "You know how many people live in my zip code", to which I wanted to reply "yeah dumb ass, but how many of them know who you are, that you live in that zip code AND have your credit card?" A lady sends her boyfriend in to get her a pack of smokes and then throws the wrapper out the window as they drive off. Then a guy comes in, waves $10 in front of me and says "prepay 10 bucks", while I'm counting out change to another customer. Had to start counting all over again, made him wait even longer. A woman comes in, drops $20 on the counter for pre-pay and walks out (this happens a lot, specially when it's busy). What am I, psychic? Do I know what car you came in or what pump you're on? It says "Cashiers have less than $100" on the door, not "Cashiers all moonlight for Madame Dharma's Psychic Hotline". And to top the whole night off some guy walks in, grabs an 18 pack of Keystone Light and just casually walks out the door. Thank you for listening, I feel much better. And I still like the job. After all, I'm not the one with high blood pressure over something I have no control over. I'm not the one that has to wait even longer because I was impatient. And I'm not the one that got the free beer. (Ok, that one really doesn't work), but I'm not the one that has to walk all the way back in to find out that they really should have waited until they were sure the cashier knew which pump to put the $20 on.......... |
This
list is the work of Charles J. Sykes, author of the book Dumbing
Down Our Kids: Why American Children Feel Good About Themselves But
Can't Read, Write, Or Add. |
| Pictures
to make you laugh. |
06/10/05
| Got some more pictures
of funny signs in an e-mail today. I think I skipped all the ones that
I already have posted here, but if not, oh well. If you want to see
them |
06/08/05
Got
three pictures from Danny from up at the property. Click on the thumbnail
to see them better. |
||
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06/07/05
Lynda
sent me some new pictures of her, Todd and Paige. If you want to see
these adorable pictures,
|
2005
Darwin Awards (Thank you Danny) |
#1
: When his 38-caliber revolver failed to fire at his intended victim
during a holdup in Long Beach, California, would-be robber James Elliot
did something that can only inspire wonder. He peered down the barrel
and tried the trigger again. This time it worked.... |
#2
The chef at a hotel in Switzerland lost a finger in a meat cutting
machine and, after a little hopping around, submitted a claim to his
insurance company. The company expecting negligence, sent out one
of its men to have a look for himself. He tried the machine and lost
a finger. The chef’s claim was approved. |
#3
A man who shoveled snow for an hour to clear a space for his car during
a blizzard in Chicago returned with his Vehicle to find a woman had
taken the space. Understandably, he shot her. |
#4
After stopping for drinks at an illegal bar, a Zimbabwean bus driver
found that the 20 mental patients he was supposed to be transporting
to Bulawayo had escaped. Not wanting to admit his incompetence, the
driver went to a nearby bus stop and offered everyone waiting there
a free ride. He then delivered the passengers to the mental hospital,
telling the staff that the patients were very excitable and prone
to bizarre fantasies. The deception wasn’t discovered for 3
days. |
#5
An American teenager was in the hospital recovering from serious head
wounds received from an oncoming train. When asked how he received
the injuries, the lad told police that he was simply trying to see
how close he could get his head to a moving train before he was hit. |
#8
(Yes, I skipped a few)
As a female shopper exited a New York convenience store, a man grabbed
her purse and ran. The clerk called 911 immediately, and the woman
was able to give them a detailed description of the snatcher. Within
minutes, the police apprehended the snatcher. They put him in the
car and drove back to the store. The thief was then taken out of the
car and told to stand there for a positive ID. To which he replied,
“Yes, officer, that’s her. That’s the lady I stole
the purse from.” |
#9
The Ann Arbor News crime column reported that a man walked into a
Burger King in Ypsilanti, Michigan, at 5 a.m., flashed a gun, and
demanded cash. The clerk turned him down because he said he couldn’t
open the cash register without a food order. When the man ordered
onion rings, the clerk said they weren’t available for breakfast.
The man, frustrated, walked away. A 5-STAR STUPIDITY AWARD WINNER! |
#10
When a man attempted to siphon gasoline from a motor home parked on
a Seattle street, he got much more than he bargained for. Police arrived
at the scene to find a very sick man curled up next to a motor home
near spilled sewage. A police spokesman said that the man admitted
to trying to steal gasoline and plugged his siphon hose into the motor
home’s sewage tank by mistake. The owner of the vehicle declined
to press charges, saying that it was the best laugh he’d ever
had. |
06/04/05
Just
got back from the property. Alex, Marijke and Lynda are in a Triathlon
later this month and they decided to do a little training while we
were up there. We're about 15 miles from Duchesne, and they rode their
bikes most of the way, and then ran the rest, all the way through
and a mile past Duchesne. If you want to see some of the pictures
I got of the whole thing, just
(Told ya I'd get them on tonight Lynda.) |
05/31/05
For
those of you far away, missing the mountains and other geographic
aspects of Salt Lake, here are some pictures I took the last couple
of weeks. Oh, yeah, I suppose those of you here could take a look
also..... |
And
for more pictures of the changes at the Chevron |
